Unanswered Prayer and A Hidden God

Sometimes, from our point of view in our prayers, God seems to hide Himself when He does not give to us what we request of Him. We ask the Lord for this or that, but we do not receive it. We may ask again and again, but what we request is not given.

From our point of view, therefore, it seems as if God is hidden. It is as if He does not hear what we say. We cannot find Him. Heaven is silent. No one is paying any attention.

The reason we are not granted our requests may very well be that we ask something contrary to God's will. Then it ought not to surprise us that God does not give us our request. The solution to the problem is, quite obviously, learn to pray, in every request that you make, "Thy will be done." James puts it succinctly: "For that ye ought to say, If the Lord will, we shall live, and do this, or that" (4:15).

But sometimes we are convinced that we are praying according to the will of God. Perhaps we justify our petition with a line of reasoning similar to this: "I have been given certain responsibilities of God in His kingdom and covenant. Now the Lord has sent me an affliction that makes it impossible for me to carry out my responsibilities. And so, because it is His will that I carry out my responsibilities, it is also His will that I be delivered from this affliction."

I am sure the apostle Paul reasoned much the same way when he prayed that God would remove the thorn from his flesh (2 Cor. 12:7-9). He was sure that he could not possibly perform his work as missionary to the Gentiles unless the Lord would remove the thorn. And so he prayed-- three times no less! Heaven was silent. God apparently did not hear him in his anxious request. God said nothing-- neither yes nor no. Where was God? Could He not hear?

Yet even this prayer was not in harmony with the will of God, and Paul's careful reasoning could not make it such. How often does not this happen with us! We mistake, once again, our own desires for God's will, although it may very well be that, as in the case of Paul, we sell the grace of God short. God's grace is able to do beyond what we ask or think, but we are sometimes, in our weak faith, doubtful whether this is really true.

God, in effect, told Paul the following: (1) Get busy with the work to which you were called; (2) Quit praying about that thorn, for I am not going to take it away; (3) When it comes down to it, I really cannot use you unless you continue to have that thorn. The only way you can do your work, quite contrary to what you think, is if that thorn remains; (4) the reason is twofold. My grace is sufficient for you to do the work, and do not sell my grace short. Also my strength is made perfect in weakness. That is, only when you, Paul, are as weak as it is possible to be and the work is still done, will it become apparent that I did it all, and not you. And that is the way it ought to be.

Prof. Herman Hanko 

When You Pray, pp. 147-148

https://rfpa.org/collections/books-by-herman-hanko/products/when-you-pray 

Dealing With the Depressed

Spiritual depression is an involved and complex condition. In dealing with the depressed we must be prepared for great anguish and heartache in the work, as well as for the richest blessings when God grants uplifting to the troubled soul. Here we weep with those who weep, call upon God out of the depths, feel all our inadequacies, and cry out for light. Working with the depressed requires much spiritual strength and wisdom and can leave the pastor/elder weary if he is not consciously trusting in the Lord and hoping in Him (Jer. 17:7).

Spiritual depression is a common ailment of the soul. The frequency with which Scripture (especially the Psalms) deals with this subject brings one to the conclusion that it is a very common condition in the lives of the saints. Almost no saint whose life is depicted in the Scriptures was without times of depression. This answers one of the great questions of the depressed: "How can I be a child of God if I feel this way?" The presence of depression does not mean one is not in a state of grace and adoption. It does not mean that my life is not consistent with what God has made me to be, and thus it is something I must seek the grace of God to overcome and change. Depression keeps us from living to the praise of His grace, and therefore is something from which I must repent (1 Pet. 2:9).

Spiritual depression is not a malady before which we stand defenseless and helpless, simply waiting for the time when the storm clouds will pass and the sun will return. The child of God can do something about it. Depression brings us to see our helplessness (and a whole lot of other things about ourselves too). However, God shows these things not to crush us, but to reveal to us the all sufficiency of the great Physician, who has carried our sorrows, and in whose wings there is healing. He instructs us as to where we have gone through His Word, the grace to change. As great as depression is, ans we must not minimize its depths if we are to deal effectively against it, the grace of Christ is far greater. Also concerning this seemingly impenetrable spiritual darkness we labor in the confidence that God's child "can do all things through Christ who strengtheneth me" (Phil. 4:13).

What is Depression?

By spiritual depression we mean more than what is meant by the popular use of the term. Commonly when we say, "I'm depressed," we mean, "I am feeling low, down, blue, discouraged." Spiritual depression is more than that. It is when the low spirit affects us our life in substantive ways, when we are down and out, when the low feelings take over and drag us even deeper. It is not just feeling bad about one's self and one's circumstances. It is being overwhelmed and governed by those feelings.

Depression is a feeling of guilt and unworthiness. It is a debilitating mood. In depression the conscience becomes overly active and introspective while the body itself slows down and operates at a lower level. In depression we become absorbed in thoughts like, "What good am I?" What's the use anyway? I just can't take it, it's too much."

The Psalmist in the 42nd Psalm gives an extraordinarily accurate picture of depression. Two figures are used: 1) Downcast - As a man bowed down under the weight of some heavy object, so the depressed soul feels itself under a crushing weight from which it cannot escape itself and which it cannot bear. 2) Disquieted - As the sea is tossed by the storm and not at ease, so the depressed heart is plunged into the depths of woe and feels itself unable to attain peace. The psalmist also speaks of the outward symptoms of depression. He looks troubled, haggard, dejected, vexed. He weeps day and night. It has affected his appetite. He is worried about himself and what is happening to him. Everything seems to be on top of him and he is drowning in a sea of woe.

The Scriptures impress on us the depth of this despair. We have already seen that it can affect us physically to the point of sickness, ulcers, weight loss, obesity, loss of memory, etc. (For this see Ps. 77:2-4; Ps. 102:3-5; Ps. 88). It can lead to a total breakdown, in which we cease to function at all (see Jer. 20:7-9). And still more, in depression the sense of God's presence is lost. In the throes of depression we can conclude that God does not answer our prayers or take pity. We become angry with Him and feel ourselves cut off from His presence forever (see Ps. 13; Ps. 77:1-10).

Thus spiritual depression is an interruption of the experience of the peace of God in the soul, a loss of the assurance of God's favor, a surrender to the monster of self-pity, an introspection which is not guided by faith in Christ but by our own pride.

What is the Cause of Depression?

The causes can be many. Anything which tends to get us down a bit can be the initial cause of depression. It can be a change of job, working too much, resentment or bitterness towards someone or something that has happened, marital strife, the waywardness of our child, a disappointment, our looks and abilities, etc. These and more can be the occasion from which depression arises. Or it can be when we know we are guilty to begin with; that is, it can come out of a known and willful sin and transgression of God's will.

However, depression is due to the response one gives to the difficulty, change, disappointment, or sin that has come into one's life. When we fail to respond biblically, and fail to have all our thinking and acting regarding the thing that has come into our lives or the thought has risen in our minds controlled by the Scriptures, then depression strikes. Depression arises when we are governed by and give in to our own feelings regarding these upsetting things, rather than being ruled in our thinking, willing, and acting by the Scriptures.

Depression can spiral. We can fail to handle a responsibility biblically. We walk in a sin impenitently and without making amends as far as we can. we fail to deal with a setback as God would have us deal with it. We look at ourselves and think of ourselves according to the standards we have devised. As a result we feel bad. Then, instead of following our obligations before God and dealing with that responsibility, sin, or lack of self-esteem as God would have-us to do, we follow our feelings on these things. We find ourselves seeking pity. And the end is that we feel worse and worse about ourselves, our circumstances, and our obligations.

We must remember that we are frail and weak saints of God who need at every turn of the way and moment of the day to have our innermost thoughts governed by the Word of the Lord. So easily we slip into viewing life's situations and ourselves from our own vision, rather than through the cross of Christ crucified. When we do this, and then leave ourselves stand for a moment before the gaping hole of our own feelings, our steps well nigh slip and we conclude: "for all the day long have I been plagued, and chastened every morning)" Ps. 73.

The question is asked whether depression can have physical causes. It would be a denial of Scripture to rule that out. Scripture teaches that God has made us one, yet soul and body, and thus there is an inseparable relationship between the physical life and the spiritual. This is powerfully illustrated in the life of our Lord. We read that the devil came to tempt Jesus after He had been in the wilderness forty days and nights fasting, and therefore in a weakened physical state. He, the devil, chose this moment because he was and remains a careful student of human nature, playing every contributing factor in our makeup for his advantage. Because of the close relation between soul and body, we may not dismiss physical factors which either can enter in or lie at the root of depression. A complete physical examination, as well as the use of drugs which supply the body what it normally produces and is not producing can be helpful in the treatment of depression.

Nevertheless, to place depression in the category of physical illness would be a mistake. Then, as with a toothache, so also when my soul is in the depths and I find fear and guilt on every side. I should take myself to a medical doctor for the cure. Then I need perhaps an injection, but I do not need the present power of Christ's grace delivering me from the bondage of my sinful self. To make depression primarily a physical ailment is to negate the need for the real delivering mercies of God working in the heart and soul. Besides, even the aspects of depression which are physically related only underscore and make vivid the problems which are present in the life of the particular saint suffering depression. Depression has to do with sin. Ultimately it has to do with unbelief, the greatest sin against which we struggle. It is the failure to trust in God, even though He slay me. As hard as that is for me to hear, hear it I must, for then, and only then, can I rejoice in the power of Christ Jesus who came to save sinners also from the pit of depression.

How Should We Deal With the Depressed?

First of all, we must handle the Word of God skillfully, compassionately, and believingly.

I trust we need not work to establish the case among us that the Word of God is the powerful tool for treating depression. Depression can and does lead God's saints to be unable to read the Bible and even to become angry at the Bible itself. For a time they cannot use it right. Or they can be using it but not applying it. Therefore, I want to stress the modifiers above: skillfully, compassionately, and believingly. To bring this out, we should be aware of two dangers in this regard. 

The first danger is that of compassion without actually bringing the Word of God. Now compassion is essential for the work of the pastor/elder as Paul sets forth in Acts 20. But there must be more than mere empathy. If all that is accomplished is that the distressed of soul says, "How understanding and sympathetic you are," but he is not told what the Word of God says to him in his need, what good is it? The goal of much shepherding today seems to be to establish the reputation of ministers as sympathetic men. If we are to help our people in their need, the Word must be brought, for it is in the Word that we believe Jesus comes with His healing grace. More, we will make matters worse. The child of God has come to us and told us his woe. It is out there as big as ever. If no word from God comes, the preoccupation with the problem has only increased as a result of the talk with the pastor. We must not only talk about the problem, we must through the problem to see what God says about it. Even the pastor of pastors, the apostle Paul, did not allow his warm heart for the sheep to keep back the Word of God. He reminds the elders of Ephesus, "I kept back nothing that was profitable for you..."

The second danger is to use the Word of God as some kind of magic wand. This is to use Scripture simplistically, to read a few texts and explain them in a general sort of way and then send the person off reciting a favorite passage. We must be faithful and honest with the Scriptures, using them skillfully- that is, practically, substantively, concretely, pointedly. The Scriptures must be brought to bear on the specifics of the depression the person is enduring.

Secondly we must work with the depressed in the framework of the truths of justification and the adequacy of God.

Justification is the truth which, when it rests in the heart, must soothe the troubled soul. Justification humbles pride by teaching that my acceptance with God cannot be based on myself even if I were as good as my pride would want me to be. Justification proclaims to the soul in the depths that there is no condemnation to it. Justification is truth which supplies the motivation for sanctification and thus the reason why I as a despairing saint ought not despair and can do what I find so impossible to do. It was the knowledge that God had cast all his sins behind His back that delivered Hezekiah from the pit. The sins and failures he saw and could not hide from his view had been hid by God. This knowledge got him up again to praise God and busy himself with teaching his children (Is. 38).

The adequacy of God is the answer to every conceivable feeling of inadequacy in ourselves. "Hope thou in God!" was the counsel David gave to his downcast and disquieted soul. We labor in the conviction that in knowing God in His being there is a balm for every wound, correction for every thought, strength for every duty. God delights in having His people know Him in the full array of His virtues (Ex. 34:5-7). He is Jehovah, and, therefore, though we are so weak and sorrow is so strong, He abides stronger. To the fear which the depressed have that He will not help me, He proclaims His name as merciful, gracious, and longsuffering. In dealing with depression we must never doubt the adequacy of our God.

And thirdly, we must take depression seriously, watching for the warning signs, and spending the needed time and energy in counseling which depression requires.

Our eyes should be sensitive to the beginning of depression in the lives of the saints. Some of the indications of depression are: withdrawal from family and friends; loss of interest or satisfaction in one's calling; a feeling of isolation and loneliness; slowed thinking; feeling a burden; feeling helpless and without hope; problems on the job or in the family; sleep difficulty and weight loss; irritability; talk about dying; prolonged grief.

Depression should be something we address in the preaching, frequently in fact, as the struggle against depression is in one form or another common in the lives of God's people, and will be so long as they are in the body of this death.

We should be prepared to spend the time that is needed and deal as thoroughly as we can with the cases of depression that come to our attention. Seldom is one visit to the pastor or elder going to alter a pattern of depression in the life of a child of God. It does not work that way. "This kind can come forth by nothing, but by prayer and fasting" (Mark 9:29).

As difficult as this work can be, we engage in it, as with all our work, in the undefeatable confidence that "The Lord redeemeth the soul of His servants: and none of them that trust in Him shall be desolate" (Ps. 34:22).

Carl J. Haak

Pastor of the Protestant Reformed Church of Lynden, Washington

The Standard Bearer

Volume 69/1993

Issue: 11, 3/1/193

https://standardbearer.rfpa.org/articles/dealing-depressed?keyword[0]=depression 

Affliction and A Hidden God

It is probably in times of deep affliction, when our souls are overwhelmed in us by the agonizing difficulties of our way, that the problem of a hidden God is greatest.

Our afflictions need not necessarily be caused by some specific sin in our lives. We have the example of Job to testify of this. 

Nevertheless, there are times when we ask the Lord for something that we are specifically commanded to ask for-- perhaps grace to endure some great trial. But even though we ask according to the will of God, we are still confronted with a hidden God, for no answer comes, even then.

I would venture a guess that, at some time in his or her life, every child of God experiences the same thing as Job. In fact, I am sure that this is why God put this beautiful and important book in the Bible. We all need it.

As was true with Job, sometimes God hides Himself even when there is no chastisement for sin. In a way, even then sin surely is involved. We are by no means perfect in this life, and always chastisement is for the purpose of correction. But God may hide Himself simply to teach us an important truth concerning us or Him, a truth which we have to learn and know. 

God's answer to Job was surprising and very disconcerting. It came, first, through Elihu, who seemed to be the only one with a correct understanding of things; but finally God Himself spoke of Job in that powerful and soul-shaking speech found in chapters 38-41.

In sum, these chapters make just one point, a point which was God's answer to Job. God had hidden Himself from Job. Yes, He did. But then He revealed Himself, and this is what He said.

"Job," God said, "you must learn that I am God. I am the one only God, the creator of all, great, glorious, perfect, beyond understanding in all My works and ways. 

"Now, Job, because this is true, you must also learn that I am under no obligation whatsoever to explain anything I do. I am not under obligation to you to explain what I do to you. I am not to be summoned, as you would like, into the dock to give an account to you of My actions and to justify My deeds. Who, really, do you think you are? Can you require of Me that I explain to you what I do? And even when I do what I have done to you, I have no need whatsoever to justify my actions to you.

"Were you present when I created all things? Were you there when I conceived my own perfect counsel? Should I have consulted with you before I determined to do what I decided had to be done for the perfect glory of My name?

"Job, the simple fact of the matter is that, as far as you are concerned, there is no answer. Nor will I give one. Nor need I give one. I am God!" 

Paradoxically, this is precisely God's purpose in hiding Himself: that we may learn this great truth. To use Calvin's expression, God batters us. We may perhaps rebel. So He batters us some more. We may, with great difficulty, submit but plead to know the reason. He batters us some more. We may cry out that we can take no more of this awful battering. He batters some more. We still have not learned.

And so, finally, at the bottom of the pit of our pain, God shows us that He is God and does what He pleases-- also with us. And so, finally, we say, Lord, whatever is Thy will, do with me as it seems good to Thee. Whatever happens to me is of no account. Do Thou Thy will. I want nothing more." Or as Job put it, "Though He slay me, yet will I trust in Him" (13:15).

Then the God who is hidden speaks of His love in tenderest of terms and with infinite mercy towards us. He shows us that He never really was hidden, for He continued to hide all our tears in His bottle, but He assures us that it was necessary that He withdraw Himself from us so that we might come to appreciate more fully the wonders of His grace. He humbles us, but only to lift us up. He brings us very low, because only by our going through a deep valley can He bring us to the mountaintop. To forsake us is to draw us nearer to Himself.

Prof. Herman Hanko

When You Pray, pp. 148-149

https://rfpa.org/collections/books-by-herman-hanko/products/when-you-pray 

 

Why God is Pleased to Place His People in a Very Tempestuous and Stormy Night

He does it that His people may be conformed to Christ.

As they are tempted and distressed, so was He; as it is with their souls a season of darkness, so it was also with His holy soul that was full of amazement under a sense of God’s wrath- though He never despaired indeed, as many of His servants are apt to do under the violence of sorrow. Isaiah 53:3: [He was] a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief.” When He was so saddened for our sakes, it is reasonable to think that we should sometimes taste the bitter cup, and not always rejoice and be at ease. If God did not spare His only Son, why should we expect to feel nothing but what is very mild and gentle? Our Lord has told us that the world will rejoice, but we shall be sorrowful (see John 16:20-22). The sufferings of Christ were to give satisfaction to divine justice; ours are not to be looked upon with such an eye. By these terrors and desertions we learn to value and esteem the love of Christ, who was pleased to redeem us when it cost Him so very dearly, and who was pleased not to decline the field of battle, though it was not to be managed without vast labor and a mighty pain. And the apostle says, “Rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ’s sufferings” (1 Peter 4:13).

He does it because our fall and our ruin came by pleasure.

It was a delight. Though a very short one, that made our forefather Adam apostatize; and it is equitable that we should be cured by something contrary to that which occasioned our disease, seeing that our joys are dangerous. He makes our grief and sorrows to be medicinal.

He does it because it is a very proper season wherein to be sorrowful.

Among all the other excellent appointments of providence, this one is that there should be a time to weep (Ecclesiastes 3:4). There is in this weeping night nothing strange or uncouth. All our fathers have, in some respect, pass under a cloud, and a cloud that has dissolved in rain, and which has given the good pilgrims much trouble as they went along. 1 Peter 1:6: “Now for a season ye are in heaviness through manifold temptations.” It is no more strange to see mourning in the church on earth than to see storms or snow in winter. Everything is beautiful in its season, and so is affliction. The night is useful to the world, though not as pleasant as the day. Our sickly state will not admit us to have nothing but what is satisfying to our palates; the wise God, therefore, many time, instead of very pleasant things confers the best upon us. We must allow the great Master of the family to maintain its order, prosperity, and welfare by His own methods, and to chastise us when and how and as long as He pleases; for His strokes, though very painful, yet are still very just. And it is in order to achieve some better thing that He designs for us that at the present we are made to grieve; for grief, as Dr. [Robert] Harris observes, is an imperfect passion, not made for itself but for some higher use, as are all the rest of the declining affections, such as hatred for love, fear for confidence, and so sorrow for joy, unto which it is subservient. Lancing and searing are not for themselves, but for ease and remedy. A bitter potion is not for sickness, though it may cause if for a time, but for health. In the same way, sorrow is made for joy, and joy is the end of sorrow. And God, we may be sure, will have His end.

He does it to show His own sovereignty both in afflicting and in comforting.

He causes such a prince as Job to sit upon a dunghill, in anguish and trouble, while another sits in unclouded glory on the throne. He pulls down one and sets up another, and does whatsoever He will in occasion of mourning for the soul, and one that He permits at various times; for though He does not deny what is absolutely necessary to the being of the Christian, yet He many times does not promise to give what would make it very comfortable. He, for wise reasons, allows the hearts of His people to be overwhelmed with sorrow when He could make them brim-full of joy, as in nature He lets the earth gape for thirst when He could immediately refresh it with seasonable flowers.

Who, in all this mysterious variety of His administrations, can say unto Him, “What art Thou doing?” Some countries are desert, barren and forsaken, burned up with scorching heat, and filled with beasts of prey; others are inhabited and fruitful, and greatly blessed, and He sees fit to have part of His dominions thus qualified. Some He draws with the sweet savor of His ointments, and they perceive nothing but what is gratifying and refreshing; but others He sorely terrifies with the greatness of His power, His holiness, and His majesty, and they never eat nor live with pleasure.

The Captain of our salvation causes some of His soldiers to meet with much more formidable dangers than others do: they have more sweat, fatigue, toil, and painful duty, though He will be sure to help them Himself when they are ready to give way. The manner of His dispensations to His servants is varied, both in life and at death. Some are chastened all the day long, and with sore pains upon their beds too, while others have no pain at all. Some go drooping to the grave, bowed down with God’s displeasure, while His favor and His gracious eye make others go smiling there. Enoch and Elijah had a pleasant removal from the world; very short and very glorious was their passage hence. But most men groan a long while before they are called away, and then He does it to show His own power, so that when the wound appears to be desperate He can cure it with a word. When the night is most full of horror, He can bring the reviving day. When the storms are highest, He needs but say to the waves, to our doubts and our fears, “Be still,” and immediately there is a calm.

What is such a God, so great and so good a God, not able to do! He who produced from a mere chaos this beautiful and pleasant world needs only say to us in the middle of our doleful darkness, “Let there be light,” and it shall be so. Job 5:18: “He maketh sore, and bindeth up. He woundeth, and His hands make whole.” It is in acknowledgment of this sovereign ability it is that David prays in Psalm 51:8, “Make me to hear joy and gladness, that the bones which Thou hast broken may rejoice.”

Why so? Had not Nathan told him that his sin was pardoned? Yes, but all the testimonies of men are nothing without the inward witness of the Holy Spirit. God has committed to men the administration of His Word, but reserves the Spirit to Himself, that Spirit which gives consolation to our hearts and peace to our consciences. When Mary and Martha were in sorrow for their brother’s death, it is said in John 11:19 that many of the Jews came from Jerusalem to comfort them. But they received no comfort until Christ Himself had come there.

Timothy Rogers

Trouble of Mind and the Disease of Melancholy, pp. 340-343

Depression: Its Cure

What is written here about depression does not reflect the expertise of a trained psychologist or psychiatrist. Rather it is the viewpoint of a pastor who not only has had to deal with the scourge of depression in his own life, but also has had the privilege of helping his parishioners in their battle with depression.

In searching for a cure to depression it is imperative that we take as our starting point the Scriptures. It is true that the Bible is not a textbook on psychology. Nevertheless, Scripture does contain a great deal of psychology (a word concerning the soul), and therefore has much to say to the problem of depression. Besides, the Bible is God's infallibly inspired Word, the sole rule for faith and practice. In the Scripture therefore we will find the key to overcoming what to many is the horrible enemy of depression.

 What Hope is There for the Depressed Christian?
 

The biggest concern of a depressed person is whether there is any hope for him, any way out. A person who slips into the pit of depression experiences that his life has fallen apart. He is overcome with anxiety and insecurity. He can no longer concentrate. He can barely function. All joy is gone from his life. In spite of his best efforts he has slowly been backed into a comer. He does not know where to turn, what to do. He is caught and knows no way out. His greatest fear is that he will never escape the horrible pit into which he has fallen, that he will be emotionally incapacitated for the rest of his life.

God's Word gives hope and wonderful assurance to the believing Christian in his depression. This is not the case, however, for the unbeliever. The Bible holds forth no hope for those outside of Jesus Christ. To the ungodly the Bible speaks only of wrath and condemnation. This is very depressing! This is not to say that the unbeliever cannot manage to overcome depression to one degree or another. The point is that one is given no encouragement or hope in Scripture, so long as he remains in his unbelieving state.

The Bible, however, does give tremendous hope to the believer in Christ. The Bible assures the believer that the Lord will never leave him or forsake him, not even in the darkness of his depression (cf. Gen. 28: 15, Heb. 13:5). The Lord is his refuge so that he has nothing to fear (cf. Ps. 46). The Lord is his keeper (cf. Ps. 121). In addition, nothing is impossible for the Lord. When one is in the state of depression, the resumption of a normal, productive, happy life seems totally impossible. However, what is impossible for man is possible with God (Gen. 18:14; Matt. 19:26). Finally, there is the promise to the believer that God will provide a way to escape the trials and temptations of life, even his depression (cf. I Cor. 10:13).

These and other assurances the Christian must accept by faith. As indicated, the depressed Christian cannot see a way out. If he did, he would certainly have followed it; for a depressed person wants more than anything else to be delivered from the horrible scourge of depression. However, the situation looks hopeless, impossible. The depressed believer must therefore not live by sight but by faith. He must simply believe and be ready to follow God's way out. Sad to say, it is not uncommon for the depressed Christian to lose even the assurance of his salvation. In that case, he must be pointed to the sure promises of God to save the believer, and he must be called to walk in the way of faith.

It is important that the depressed Christian have this hope of recovery. Overcoming depression is a slow and difficult process. It requires that a person learn things about himself that are humbling and painful. It requires that he also learn a new approach to life that is sometimes even frightening. If he is to do this, he must have the hope that in Jesus Christ there is a way out of his depression.

What are Some Key Elements in Dealing with Depression?

In dealing with depression it is helpful to recognize that there are certain character traits that make one prone to depression. 

One such trait is low self-esteem. By low self-esteem we mean a low estimation of self, feelings of inferiority and worthlessness. One who has low self-esteem sees many good qualities in others but can find very little that is worthwhile in himself. He is convinced that there is very little that he can do and has done that is really worthwhile. He concentrates his attention on all the failures of his life, real or imagined. This convinces him that he is a failure. For this reason he also tends to hate himself.

There are very few who can live with this kind of self-estimation. Who can accept the conclusion that he is inferior, worthless, of no account? For that reason, those with low self-esteem generally strive to convince themselves that they are of true worth and value. They are constantly trying to prove themselves, in order that they may find a measure of self-acceptance.

This inner drive for self-acceptance generally leads a person to live for the approval of others. If others approve of him, he can approve of himself. If others accept him as worthwhile, he can accept himself. This is generally not a conscious thing, but it is very real. Those who have low self-esteem crave the praise of others, are elated at the approval of their peers, but are devastated at disapproval.

This inner drive for self-acceptance also leads to perfectionism. By perfectionism we mean the tendency to set high and lofty goals, to have unrealistic standards. The perfectionist is always in pursuit of the unattainable. Such people tend to be workaholics, overachievers. They can accomplish a great deal. On the other hand, however, these same perfectionistic tendencies can make someone a pathetic underachiever. A person can have such high standards and such lofty goals that he can never accomplish anything. He is afraid to get started on anything for fear his efforts will not be good enough. Or he may get started but, for fear of failure, never finish anything. The point, however, is that the perfectionist is driven by the desire to prove himself, that he may salvage for himself some form of self-esteem and self-acceptance.

These tendencies (low self-esteem, seeking the approval of others, perfectionism) place a person on a collision course with depression.

The chief cause of depression is stress. Certainly there may be and often are other contributing factors. But the chief factor in most depression is stress. Place a person under enough emotional stress for a long enough period of time and he will inevitably slip into the black pit of depression.

Now, consider that those with the tendencies we have just described do in fact live at a very high stress level. How stressful, after all, to live constantly with the conviction of being inferior and worthless! How stressful to live for the approval of others! It is impossible to please all the people all the time. How stressful to strive for unrealistic and unattainable goals, to "fail" again and again, to live with the feelings of guilt that come with such "failures."

The stress that is generated by this approach to life often leads to depression. The normal problems and crises of life quickly overload such a person with more stress than he can handle. The result is the blackness of depression.

To overcome depression requires that these tendencies be overcome and reversed.

The Bible has a great deal of instruction at this point.

First, the Bible teaches that a born-again Christian, who is living his faith in Jesus Christ, is not worthless, not inferior, but very important and valuable.

This is not the case, of course, with the unbeliever. We must not accept the popular notion that everyone, regardless of his relationship to Jesus Christ and regardless of his behavior, is of great value and worth and thus can esteem himself highly. This is humanism at its worst. God's Word is very clear on this point. The unbeliever, who lives apart from Jesus Christ, is totally depraved. He is vile and wicked in all his ways. He may be wonderfully gifted, have tremendous potential and ability; but, being an unbeliever, he uses all his good gifts sinfully. For that reason he is worthless. In his unbelieving state he is of no value whatsoever to the kingdom of Jesus Christ. His life and accomplishments do not promote the cause of God but are a hindrance. Consequently, he is nothing; he accomplishes nothing worthwhile. He has every reason to feel inferior, to esteem himself as nothing, to hate himself.

In Jesus Christ, however, this is all changed. The testimony of Scripture is that the born-again Christian is a new creature in Jesus Christ (cf. II Cor. 5:17). He is the workmanship of God, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God has before ordained that he should walk in them (Eph.2:10).

The implication of these and similar passages are enormous. This implies, for example, that the true Christian is wonderfully gifted of God. He not only has certain natural gifts but also the gift of grace to use his natural abilities in the service of God.

This implies also that the Christian has important work to do in the kingdom. Each believer has a place of labor in the kingdom that is uniquely his. For that place of labor he has been wonderfully gifted by God. And no one else can fill his place, do his work. Others in the church and kingdom are also wonderfully gifted by God. But they have been fitted to occupy a different place, to do other work. Each has his own unique place of labor for which he has been wonderfully gifted. Furthermore, the place of work that God has for each in the kingdom is important. For God will use it to advance the cause of His kingdom.

These spiritual realities must guide the born-again Christian as he seeks to come to a proper estimation of himself. For the Christian to have feelings of inferiority and worthlessness is to deny the work of Jesus Christ in his life and the glorious place God has for him in the kingdom. To esteem himself as important, valuable, and of great worth in Jesus Christ is to lay hold of the reality of his own salvation. 

With this proper estimation of himself the born-again Christian can also accept himself. God does. In Romans 14:17, 18 the apostle Paul indicates that those who serve Christ in righteousness, peace, and joy of the Holy Spirit are acceptable(euartetos, well-pleasing) to God. If God accepts His people as they labor in their respective places in His kingdom, they too must accept themselves. If God is pleased with them as His workmanship, they must be pleased with themselves as well.

With a proper self-esteem the born-again Christian can also love himself. In a certain sense the Christian must hate himself. He must loathe his sin (cf. Ez. 6:9). He must also loathe himself for his sin (cf. Ez. 20:42). He must hate what the New Testament Scriptures call the old man, or the old man with its deeds (cf. Rom. 6:6; Col. 3:9). This is our old sinful self not yet renewed by grace. This self-loathing must bring the Christian to his knees daily to find forgiveness in the cross and the power of grace to overcome sin in his life. On the other hand, however, the born-again Christian certainly is to love himself. This is implied in the great commandment of the law, which is to love our neighbor as ourselves (Matt. 22:39). The Christian is to love what God has made him to become in Jesus Christ - a new creature wonderfully fitted to good works in the kingdom of Jesus Christ.

When the depressed believer learns to take this perspective of himself, the tremendous load of stress generated by a wrong estimation of himself is wonderfully lifted. He has found an essential key to overcoming his depression.

But the depressed believer must not be content to stop here. He must continue to free himself from self-induced stress by learning to live for the approval of God rather than of men.

How stressful it is to live for the approval of men. Our fellow men tend to place unreasonable and impossible demands upon us. They expect of us what we cannot attain. Their approval of us is at best fickle. Besides, no one can please everybody. One who will be all things to all men to gain their approval places himself in an impossible situation.

It is much easier, and thus less stressful, to seek the approval of God. God approves of us when in faith we use our gifts in the loving service of Him and the neighbor. God does not call us to do the impossible. His expectations of us are consistent with the gifts and abilities He has given to us. God's calling to us is to labor in our respective places in His kingdom according to the measure of grace He has bestowed on us. When we busy ourselves in this, God is well pleased. It is true, that God calls us to serve Him perfectly, without sin. And this is impossible so long as we are in the flesh. However, God has graciously provided a covering for our sins in the blood of Jesus Christ. Laboring therefore in the loving service of God, and taking our stand in the shadow of the cross to cover our sins, we enjoy God's blessed approval. It is imperative that we seek God's approval rather than that of men. For this is the command of Scripture. To Timothy the apostle Paul writes, "Study to show thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed" (II Tim. 2:15). In II Corinthians 5:9 Paul indicates that he and his co-laborers "labor that we may be accepted (eurtetos, well-pleasing) of Christ." In turn, servants are warned not to be men pleasers (cf. Eph. 6:6, Col. 3:22).
Faithfulness to these injunctions of holy Writ is another essential key for the depressed believer to conquer his depression.
Finally, the depressed believer must learn to set realistic goals and standards for himself. This means that he must learn to live according to God's expectations of him. In the first place, God expects the believer to labor diligently in the place God has given him in the kingdom and for which he has been especially fitted. God does not call the Christian, nor has He fitted the Christian, to do every good work. There are many important tasks in the kingdom that belong to others. Each believer must come to understand what is his place in the kingdom, the work for which he is fitted, and then be content to fill that place. It may not be glamorous. It may not put him in the limelight. But it is important work and God's good gift to him. Hence, he must be content to labor there according to his several abilities. This is what God expects of him. This is what the believer must expect of himself and no more.

Furthermore, God expects the believer to work but also to rest. "To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven" (Eccl. 3: 1). There is a time to work but also a time to rest and to play. There is a time to enjoy one's family. There is a time for prayer and meditation. There is also time for a vacation. Jesus Himself often needed time away from the press of the multitudes. Knowing our limitations God in His wisdom and grace even commands us to observe a day of rest, the first day of every week.

The depressed believer, however, with his perfectionistic tendencies seeks to be and do more than this. He expects more of himself than God expects. He expects of himself more than God has equipped him to do. He expects the impossible of himself. The stress, worry, anxiety, and endless problems generated by this mad approach to life easily overwhelm a person with stress and depression.

If the believer will overcome depression, he must forsake the stressfulness of perfectionism and conform his expectations of himself to God's expectations of him.

How is Depression Actually Overcome?

To overcome depression the believer needs help.

First of all, and most importantly, he needs the help of God. As we have noted earlier, if a Christian is to overcome depression he must change deeply entrenched attitudes and patterns. This requires nothing less than the power of divine grace. The believer obtains this divine power through the Word and prayer.

The sorry plight of the child of God who has fallen into deep depression is that he can scarcely pray, or concentrate sufficiently to read the precious Word of God. Such is the scourge of depression. Nevertheless, the depressed Christian must do the best he is able in this regard. If he can  concentrate on God's Word for only a few seconds, then that is where he must start. If all he can pray is, "God help me," then he must pray this with the assurance that God will hear even this brief plea. It is also helpful for the believer in the throes of depression's anxiety to reflect on familiar and comforting passages of Scripture, especially those that relate the mighty works of God to deliver His people in the past.

But the depressed child of God also needs the help of his fellow saints. The power of God's grace also reaches us through the communion of the saints.

The depressed Christian usually does not understand the principles we have been dealing with in this article. If he did, he probably would have been able to avoid the depths of depression. Besides, the judgment of a depressed person is greatly diminished. He sees everything through the dark glasses of depression, which distorts reality.

Hence, the depressed Christian must have the help of his fellow saints. He needs the help of others who understand the intricate maze of depression and can show him the way out. Ideally this would include his pastor, family members, and church members. It may require a professional counselor. The depressed believer also needs the support of others who perhaps do not understand what depression is all about but are sympathetic. He needs their support, encouragement, and prayers.

There are several important things to remember about the healing process in depression.

First, progress is slow. It takes months to slip into a deep depression; it takes equally as long to climb out of it. Those who expect to overcome depression in a few weeks will be sadly disappointed. In fact, false expectations of a quick recovery can have devastating effects when these expectations are not realized.

Secondly, it is necessary temporarily to relieve the depressed person from the crushing responsibilities of life. In depression the normal routine and responsibilities of life become too much to handle. To overcome depression it is important that a person be relieved of the responsibilities he can no longer handle. To make clear the importance of this, consider a person who has strained his back by overworking himself. For his back to heal he must rest it for a while. Should he continue to carry the same load as before, his condition will only worsen. No different are our mind and emotions. A depressed person has overloaded them with stress and strain. To allow the mind and emotions to "heal" he must give them a rest. He must get from underneath the heavy load of stress. This requires the help of family members. It may even require hospitalization.

Thirdly, a depressed person must be helped through different layers of problems. A depressed person has what we may call surface problems. These are problems of which he is aware. They usually are problems with his job, various family members, guilt feelings, etc. These problems are occasioned by the depression which has taken away his ability to function and which probably has made him irritable. These problems must be dealt with first of all. For they are very real and are pressing down upon the depressed person. However, after these problems are brought under control, there are deeper problems that must be handled. These are problems that have brought on the depression. In many instances the depressed person is not even aware of these problem areas. Quite often, if not always, underlying depression are the tendencies we have treated earlier: an unbiblical self- estimation, a tendency to seek the approval of men, perfectionism.

Fourthly, the depressed person may need medical attention. There is an inseparable connection between body and soul. When therefore the soul is ravaged by the scourge of depression, the body is invariably affected. Sometimes depression so adversely affects the body that medical attention is necessary. In this connection, anti-depressant drugs are also worthy of consideration. In depression there is a chemical imbalance in the brain. Many have debated whether this imbalance triggers the depression or the depression the imbalance. Perhaps there is a reciprocal relationship. The fact is that there is such an imbalance and that anti-depressant drugs often are able to help. Many suffering depression have been able to overcome depression much more quickly with the help of anti-depressant drugs.

Finally, the depressed believer is greatly helped by the love, concern, and prayers of his fellow saints. As emphasized before, the depressed Christian must learn not to live for the approval of others. Nevertheless, we all need the support, love, and prayers of our fellow saints. This is especially true when there is depression. Pray for one who is in depression. If he is able to receive you, visit him. Do this even if you do not understand depression. Show him your concern and support. Encourage him. He may not, however, be able to receive you, because of inner fears and turmoil. Then write him to encourage him and to express your love. This support from fellow saints is an essential element in overcoming depression.  

 James Slopsema 

http://www.prca.org/prtj/apr1993.pdf 

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